Is the United States facing an epidemic of lost and distressed youth who struggle to handle the daily challenges of life? Statistics say yes. The suicide rate for young people is on the rise, and suicide is the second leading cause of death for people ages 15 to 24, according to the Centers for Disease Control. Despite such troubling statistics, there are ways to better prepare young people so they can bounce back from the trials that life throws at them, says Dr. Kim Metcalfe, a retired professor of early childhood education and psychology, and author of Let’s Build ExtraOrdinary Youth Together. Metcalfe offers suggestions for parents and others on ways they can help build resilience in young people so they know they can handle the situation when life becomes difficult:

Give them opportunities to self-regulate. Self-regulation is when you are able to take control of your thinking, your decisions and your behavior. If you want your children to develop the skill of self-regulation, Metcalfe says, you must provide them opportunities where they are required to stop and think about the consequences of those decisions and behaviors. That means you can’t make all their decisions for them.

Use missteps, mistakes and disappointments as learning opportunities. The next time your adolescent does something you aren’t thrilled about, Metcalfe says, try asking them questions such as, “What other choice could you have made?” Use follow-up questions, such as: “If you made that choice what do you think might have happened?” “Is there another choice or option you could have considered?”

Model the resilience you want to see in them. One way to build more resilience in a teenager is to make certain you are modeling the behavior you want to see. They notice how you handle challenging situations. “If you have a difficult time bouncing back from setbacks, then it makes sense that your teens will have difficulty, too,” Metcalfe says. “Modeling for our youth what we want to develop in them is very powerful. Resilient people are able to cope with challenges, weather the storms in life, and work successfully through setbacks to reach their goals and make their dreams come true.”

Dr. Kim Metcalfe, a retired professor of early childhood education and psychology, is the author of Let’s Build ExtraOrdinary Youth Together (www.xtraordinaryyouth.com).